MOVIES THAT SUCK: “The Canyons.” / “I Spit on Your Grave” (1978, Roku) and the 2010 remake.

“The Canyons” (2013, Sundance Now) erotic thriller-drama film directed by Paul Schrader and written by Bret Easton Ellis. Set in Los Angeles, the movie follows a wealthy young man who produces low-budget horror films. Mr Schrader is supposedly good as a writer (“Taxi Driver,” “Raging Bull”) and then as director (2017’s “First Reformed.” And you know Mr Ellis for his bestsellers “Less than Zero” (1985) and “American Psycho” (1991), both turned into movies, starring Robert Downey Jr. and Christian Bale, respectively. 



       But this movie, topbilled by a wasted Lindsay Lohan and a porn actor James Deen who couldn’t act, is a tedious exercise in cinematic futility. Some critics praised Ms Lohan’s acting. Really? 

       Plot: The discovery of an illicit love affair leads two young Los Angelenos on a violent, sexually charged tour through the dark side of human nature. Uh huh. 🎭👎🎬


“I Spit on Your Grave” (1978, Roku) and the 2010 remake. Jennifer is a fiction writer based in New York City who exacts revenge on her four tormentors who gang rape and leave her for dead.


       The original, written and directed by Meir Zarchi, is noted for its controversial depiction of extreme graphic violence, particularly the lengthy depictions of gang rape, that take up 30 minutes of its runtime. (Though the Roku showing was massively edited.) 

       The 2010 remake, directed by Steven R. Monroe and written by Stuart Morse, is no different. I don't know if this is more violent and revolting since I missed the bloodbath and violation in the original. 

       There are more “Spit” movies: 2013's “I Spit on Your Grave 2,” 2015's “I Spit on Your Grave III: Vengeance Is Mine,” and 2019's “I Spit on Your Grave: Deja Vu.” Go watch at your own risk. 🎥💻📽


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